You Are Here

I've never spent nine months making an album before. Not nine solid months--i took time out for meals and for personal hygiene, of course.

But nine months of writing, adding, eliminating, rearranging, bringing things back that I had once discarded, and putting it all together again in various configurations until it starts to take shape. Well, what can I tell you? It has started to take shape.

It's like being lost in a shopping mall or some gigantic public building and finding the glass-encased map with an arrow that says: "You Are Here". Good information to know. And there's a small but definite feeling of satisfaction of knowing that, while you're still figuring out where you're going, at least you know where You are. I haven't arrived yet, but at least I can say that I'm here.

I have eleven songs. I would like two more. And when I say "songs", I mean that the chords and melodies plus most of the arrangements are complete. I am still working on words, but they are coming. I've made an effort not to try writing words. Very few lyrics have been written, so my strategy can thus be considered a howling success. But the words are beginning to flow.

Earlier in this blog, I spoke of songwriting as a process akin to learning to speak. You're all bottled up, and then a song comes but it's just music and you don't have a clear idea of what exactly it is you're trying to express yet. I think very small children get frustrated because they don't have the vocabulary to express how they feel and what they need. As a grown up, I haven't forgotten that feeling because I go through it every time I sit down to write a song. When you can't use words to express yourself, you howl and moan and cry. And then, as you learn the language, you can be more precise in expressing what you feel so others can understand you. The more I work on this music, the closer I get to the hope of understanding.

By letting go of my expectations, I find instead that what I'm putting together is just what I need. I did the same thing with the music when it wouldn't come in forms that I expected. I simply allowed myself to write whatever begged to be written, trusting my instincts rather than using my head so much. I've also tried applying this philosophy to my own life, with similarly encouraging results.

The major turning point came when I decided to use sequencing tools more. I've come up with much, much better tracks using keyboards as the basis of the songs than an acoustic guitar and a click track. I thought that doing to would make things more organic, but doing things that way just made it more difficult. Best to add that stuff later, after the compositional kinks are worked out and you have a solid track behind you. But this project was all about learning, and I am certainly learning my lessons.

The other big factor is the drum sound. I've finally found a drum sound I like, and i generally leave the mics on the kit, ready to go. I have set EQ and compressor settings I use every time and it really makes the tracks come alive. My early attempts at recording drums were ok, but getting it down to a science really helps the tracks feel like part of a greater whole. Plus, i can play drums much, much better now than I could back in autumn. And I discovered this when I went back to replace those old drum tracks with new ones.

Of the songs themselves, well...writing about music on the blog is kind of futile. But I can say that I'm playing much more piano than I expected I would have, and the types of songs I'm writing are a surprise to me. But they sound like different parts of the same thing, and that thrills me to no end. I'm acieiving cohesiveness without trying too hard.

The only thing that causes concern for me is that the kind of songs I'm writing will require some really skilled singing. In short, I'll have to sing my ass off to make them work. But I started this project because I sought a challenge. I've certainly got one.